#LMFAO: Dispatches From The Other Side

Saw this today. It’s not funny. I’m not saying it’s funny. Because it’s not. Okay FFS. OF COURSE IT IS FUNNY!!! It is somewhat difficult for a nonfiction me (you see, I’m not even saying ‘nonfiction readers’) to comprehend it because I am people. And people are people, and people are mean pricks.

I have read quite a shelf full of distressing reads (FGM, torture, famine, rape, execution, you know, stuff that makes the world go around in circles). But to beg ask for books to emotionally destroy me would be quite, morbid. Sadistic, even.

The irony is – If that question came out of my mouth, I’d be damned. Especially if it’s in a nonfiction group. But of course, we’ll never be able bring ourselves to ask such a question. It’ll unlikely cross most of our minds to phase it that way, I reckon. Can you imagine people racing to recommend nonfiction five star reads that are emotionally destroying? That’s kinda f*cking, weird f*cked-up, no?

FFS, stop making fun of fiction, you mean prick!

But, wait. Nonfiction has been similarly mocked as boring as f*ck and prudish so let me have my I-am-superior post day, okay?

Without further mockery, let me think of imagine an emotionally destroying read for this young lady…

Okay. How about this: A chicklit (duh), where Barney’s goes bankrupt, the entire 5th Avenue is sold to a real estate tycoon who wishes to turn it into Wall Street #2, make-ups are banned across the bloody world, and the leading dashing and dapper bloke Ryan Reynolds look-alike marries the antagonist b*tch? Perhaps that would emotionally destroy this reader.

Nah. I gotta try harder next time.

p.s. This mean prick (yours truly, who else) will attempt to leave this group the minute a similar post pops up. But seriously, I still think I am having too much fun… So…